


Clemency

by Maverick



Series: MavCat Productions [5]
Category: Law & Order: SVU, Oz (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-19
Updated: 2014-10-19
Packaged: 2018-02-21 17:33:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2476538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maverick/pseuds/Maverick
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A Post Arrested Development Story</p>
            </blockquote>





	Clemency

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Arrested Development](https://archiveofourown.org/works/2386136) by [CatHeights](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CatHeights/pseuds/CatHeights), [Maverick](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maverick/pseuds/Maverick). 



> Warning/Spoilers: This story takes place two and half years after the events in [Arrested Development](http://archiveofourown.org/works/2386136); therefore, it does contain spoilers for the as yet unfinished main story. 
> 
> Story Notes:
> 
>  
> 
> To my knowledge, no one yes has been executed since New York State reinstated the Death Penalty back in the 1990's but as this here is a work a fiction, I figure nobody would mind if I offed someone for the sake of the story.  
> 

When he got the notice about the date being set for Sorentino's execution, he had no intention of attending. He'd made his peace with the case, or so he thought. It might have taken him a decade but he'd finally caught and put away The Sunday Dress Strangler. It wasn't until he got the call from Mrs. Warren asking if he was going to make the drive up to Dannemora to witness the execution that he decided to go. He figured he owed it to Mary Beth and Melissa and all the other victims.  
  
Stabler thought otherwise. Oh boy, had he thought otherwise.  
  
Since Elliot had officially moved in with him six months earlier things had been good between them. Great in fact. There was something very comforting about coming home at the end of a long and gruesome day to someone who understood, someone who'd been there. Someone who's own gruesome day could trump yours. They shared the misery with each other and together were able to find some sort of peace of mind.  
  
So while Elliot understood his motivation, he didn't see how the toll it would take could ever be worth the price Toby would pay. And he told him that time and again. But Toby, being the stubborn son-of-a-bitch that he was, convinced himself that what Elliot was really saying was that Toby wasn't strong enough to take it. So of course, he had to prove him wrong.  
  
The six hour drive to the Clinton Correctional Facility, just south of the Canadian border in the northeastern corner of the state, gave Toby plenty of time to replay the fight he had with Elliot that morning.  
  
 _"Seriously, what are you trying to prove and who the hell are trying to prove it to? I know how strong you are and I *know* how much this case cost you. How's watching that bastard die gonna help anything? You've paid enough."_  
  
"By who's standards? The parents of all those little girls murdered because I didn't do my job in the first place? Randy Burton's mother or how about Randy himself, shanked inside prison?"  
  
"That argument doesn't work anymore. You did your job, you put the bastard away. This isn't about the parents or Randy, this is about you Beecher. *You*"  
  
"How do you figure?"  
  
"Because it's easy to do what you *know*. You sustained yourself on guilt for so long and that's a hard habit to break."  
  
"So what.guilt's my drug of choice now instead of alcohol?"  
  
"That's not what I'm saying and you know it. This case pushes buttons so deep inside you that you're not rational about it. And before you say it, no I'm not calling you crazy either."  
  
"You sure about that?"  
  
"Yeah, I am. You seem to forget that I've been where you are."  
  
"I don't recall anyone dying on your watch."  
  
"We've all got demons, Toby. I thought we'd decided we'd face ours together."  
  
"Why can't you just leave this alone. I'm going, end of discussion."  
  
"End of discussion huh? Excuse me for being concerned about your well-being."  
  
"More like you wanting to run my life. Last time I checked Stabler, I was still capable of making my own decisions. I realize that you were married for a long time, but don't mistake me for the little woman."  
  
"No worries there Beecher. Kathy was never such a selfish prick."  
  
"Takes one to know one, baby."  
  
He hadn't stuck around to hear Elliot's parting words. He wasn't really sure why he had been such an asshole to Elliot. That wasn't true, he knew why. Because Stabler could take it. He could lash out at him, he could let all those fears and doubts that had been twisting inside him since he got the call from Mrs. Warren break free. But of course, instead of facing those fears head on, he took it out on the person he loved most. God, he really was a selfish prick. He'd have to find a way to make it up to Elliot when he got home.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Toby shivered as the guard handed him his visitor's pass. He told himself it was just the crisp autumn air that made him cold, but deep down he knew better. It wasn't the first time he'd been inside a prison, far from it. But the stale, recycled air and bright florescent lights of the hallway gave him pause. It felt just like the morgue. He was trying to decide if that thought was appropriate or just plain morbid when he spotted Mrs. Warren and Mr. and Mrs. Doughtery seated in the small alcove at the end of the hall.  
  
Mrs. Warren greeted him with a hug. It still amazed him that neither she nor Randy's mother harbored any ill will toward him. _"You caught the bastard Tobias. Most people would have given up long ago. You didn't. Mary Beth can truly rest in peace now because of you._ He didn't see it that way and probably never would, but it was a comfort never the less. He took a seat next to Mrs. Warren as they waited to be taken to the observation room.  
  
Once they were ushered single-file into the small room across from the death chamber, a sense of claustrophobia washed over Toby . The air seemed heavy and sour. Dirty. Mrs. Warren must have felt it too because her breath became labored and she sought out Toby's hand with hers. She squeezed his palm tight as the attendant rolled up the shade covering the window that looked into the chamber. The sterile, white room on the other side of the window seemed blinding to Toby. He had to squint his eyes as they adjusted to the light. It was wrong, so fucking wrong that they were huddled in this dirty little room while Sorentino was bathed in light like some goddamn angel.  
  
He wanted to pick up his chair and throw it through that window. He wanted to crawl through the broken glass and strangle the bastard with his bare hands. He wanted to do to him, what he had done to all those little girls. He could feel the bile rise in his throat and it took all of his strength not to retch. Or scream in protest.  
  
He knew he couldn't do neither. He wouldn't give the bastard the satisfaction. Taking a deep breath he kept hold of Mrs. Warrens hand as the Warden read the charges and a priest administered the last rites. Like that fucker should be granted mercy. Like he wasn't going to burn in hell for what he did.  
  
He hadn't seen Sorentino since the verdict was handed down but he looked just the same. Calm. Quiet. Reserved. Like a fucking teacher, not the monster that he was. Here they all sat in agony, Sorentino's final victims, and the bastard had found peace. God had a cruel sense of irony.  
  
The doctor tilted the table for Sorentino to make his last statement. He smiled as he quoted Victor Hugo, _"Music expresses that which cannot be said and on which it is impossible to be silent."_  
  
It all happened quickly after that. It was too painless. Too sterile. Even watching the life seep out of Sorentino didn't change a thing. They all would be haunted by his actions. His death didn't change a damn thing.  
  
Elliot was right. He never should have come. It proved nothing. Nothing. Christ, he wished Elliot was there.  
  
He stayed behind in the observation room after everyone else had left. He needed an extra few minutes to compose himself. He was tired. So damn tired. He really needed to *see* Elliot, but there was no way he'd be able to make the drive back to the City. Maybe he could find a motel near by and call him. He was reasonably sure Elliot would accept his apology.  
  
The attendant was eyeing him impatiently, so Toby finally walked out into the hallway. He only made it across the threshold when he looked up and stopped. It had to be a mirage. His mind had finally cracked under the pressure because he couldn't be seeing what he was seeing. He closed his eyes and when he opened them again, the image was still the same--Elliot leaning against the far wall, wearing jeans and his favorite gray NYPD issue long sleeve T-shirt.  
  
The image folded his arms across his chest and smiled. "You're not crazy, well anymore than normal anyway. I'm really here."  
  
Toby took a step toward his lover and as always, Elliot met him half way. "How? Why? Thank you," he said wrapping his arms around Elliot in a hug that grounded him.  
  
Elliot squeezed him just as tight and whispered against his neck, "Did you really think I was going to let you go through this alone."  
  
Toby stepped back and met his lover's eyes. "Thought I was a selfish prick?"  
  
Elliot smiled. "You are. But you're *my* selfish prick. Besides, it's not like you got that title locked up in this relationship."  
  
"That's true," Toby said with a final squeeze to Elliot's shoulder. "When'd you get here?"  
  
"About an hour ago. Come on let's get the hell out of this place."  
  
Toby just nodded his head in reply. As they turned in their visitor badges and walked outside, Toby could smell the autumn in the air. Somewhere close, someone was burning leaves. All the protesters had packed up and gone home. He could feel the wind blow across his hair and hear the whistle of a train in the distance. All of it hit him in a cacophony of senses that left him disoriented and clutching at Elliot's arm to balance himself.  
  
"Jesus, Toby. Are you ok?"  
  
Toby took a deep gasping breath. "Just give me a sec."  
  
Caressing the small of Toby's back in soothing circles, Elliot drew him off to the side of the walkway. "Take as much time as you need."  
  
Toby bent forward and concentrated on catching his breath. "What the fuck is wrong with me?"  
  
"Decompression. That's all. Breath. That's it. Slow, easy breaths."  
  
"Decompression?" Toby asked, breath slowly returning to normal.  
  
"Yes. You just surfaced too quick and it got you in the gut."  
  
Toby wrapped his arm around Elliot's waist and leaned on the other man. "You know this from experience?"  
  
Elliot nodded his head and draped his arm around Toby's shoulder. "Yes. First time I shot and killed someone in the line of duty. When it happened I thought I was having a heart attack."  
  
Toby reached over and placed his hand over Elliot's heart, letting the steady thump-thump, thump-thump, calm him the rest of the way down. "This heart is too strong to ever just give out."  
  
Elliot placed his own hand over Toby's heart and kissed the side of his lover's neck. "Yours too Beech. Yours too."  
  
Toby smiled and started walking toward the parking lot. "I don't know about you, but I'm ready to get the fuck out of this place. Where did you park? You think we should drive back tonight or wait until morning?"  
  
"I didn't drive, so we just have your Jeep. And I booked us a room in Plattsburgh for the weekend."  
  
Toby stopped walking and turned toward Elliot. "What?"  
  
"I had Mitch fly me up here and took a cab to the prison. And it's Thursday, so I told Cragen I was taking the weekend off and he offered to call your Capt. for me to let him know the same about you."  
  
Toby spotted Elliot's duffel bag in the backseat of the Jeep as they approached the SUV. "You want to spend the weekend *here*?"  
  
Elliot smiled and let himself in the driver's side of the car, not giving Toby any opportunity to argue over who was driving. "Well if when you say *here*, you mean the prison, then no. But in case you haven't noticed, Lake Champlain is just down the road and we're surrounded by the Adirondacks in their full autumn splendor. I could think of worse ways to spend the weekend."  
  
"Elliot Stabler is voluntarily taking time off?" Toby asked sliding into the passenger seat.  
  
Elliot reached over and squeezed Toby's knee. "Yep. The bad guys are just gonna have to do without us for a while."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
When Toby exited the bathroom, wearing nothing but a towel wrapped low on his waist, Elliot was already back with their pizza. He'd placed plates and drinks on the small table next to the window overlooking the woods behind the hotel and was seated in the chair closest to the bed. "You still not hungry? Elliot asked handing Toby a can of Ginger Ale.  
  
Leaning down, Toby kissed Elliot and then moved to sit in the chair across from him. "No, I think I could eat. Breakfast was a long time ago."  
  
"Yes, it was. I just got cheese. I wasn't sure what your stomach could handle."  
  
Toby took a bite and smiled as he chewed. "Thanks. I'm not sure I'm up for anchovies and hot peppers. Then again, when am I ever up for those?"  
  
Taking a bite of his own slice, Elliot waited until he finished chewing before answering. "You don't know what you're missing."  
  
"I could do without the heartburn, thanks."  
  
"You've had a rough day, so I'll let that one go." Elliot said putting another slice of pizza on Toby's plate. They ate the rest of their meal in comfortable silence.  
  
Closing the pizza box, Elliot stood up and pulled down the covers on the bed. He offered his hand to Toby. "Come on Beech, you look beat. Lie down on the bed."  
  
Toby took his hand and let himself be settled on the bed. When Elliot went to move away, Toby pulled him down with him. "Stay."  
  
Elliot stretched out beside him, his hand on Toby's towel-clad hip. "Whatever you want Toby."  
  
Toby worked his hand up under the front of Elliot's T-shirt, again seeking the comfort of the other man's heartbeat. "When did you decide to come up here?"  
  
"After you stormed out this morning. I had planned on asking if you wanted me to come with you, but you didn't stick around long enough to let me."  
  
Toby pulled Elliot closer to him, molding his body against his lover's. "I'm sorry I was such an ass. If it's any consolation, you were right."  
  
Elliot nuzzled Toby's temple. "You're hurting. There is no consolation for that."  
  
Toby brought his mouth to Elliot's, brushing his lips softly against the other man's. "Thank you again for coming. All I could think about when I was in that room was, God I wish Elliot was here."  
  
"All you had to do was ask Toby. I would have been."  
  
"I know that. I do. I really thought I had to do it alone."  
  
Elliot rolled himself over on top of Toby and took Toby's head in his hands. "You don't have to do anything alone anymore. We're in it together."  
  
Toby opened his legs and wrapped his body around Elliot's in a fierce hug. "I'm a slow learner. Forgive me?"  
  
"Nothing to forgive," Elliot whispered as he pressed his mouth against Toby's. "Nothing."  
  
Toby reached up and threaded his fingers through Elliot's hair as he opened his mouth to deepen the kiss. He slid his tongue into his lover's mouth, letting the familiar taste of Elliot's palate, the familiar feel of Elliot's lips, wash away the grim of the day more completely than the long hot shower he had taken. Reaching behind Elliot's head to yank his lover's shirt off, Toby broke the kiss to complete his task. He needed the feel of Elliot's warm skin and taut muscle against his own. He dug his blunt fingers into Elliot's back as he wrapped himself tighter around his lover. He couldn't get close enough. He finally understood. This was all that mattered. This was life.  
  
Instinctively knowing what Toby needed, Elliot rose up on his hands and knees to pull off Toby's towel and unzip and push down his own jeans before settling back down on top of his lover. He slid his hand between them and lined up their erections, the first scrape of cock against cock sending Toby bucking against him and wildly seeking his mouth.  
  
Toby thrust his tongue inside Elliot's mouth, needing the tangle of their tongues, that slick slide of muscle against muscle, to complement the sweet, desperate friction of their cocks moving, gliding in tandem to find release.  
  
It was over too soon, but nothing that intense could last for long. But even more than the frantic coupling, Toby needed the languid peace that followed. He clung to Elliot, his mouth pressed against his lover's powerful neck, Elliot's heartbeat strong against his tongue.  
  
Shifting off Toby, Elliot wiped them both with the towel before pulling his lover's body tight against his. "You ok?"  
  
"Never better," Toby said laying his head on Elliot's chest as he pulled the covers up around them.  
  
"I love you Toby. And you're *not* alone."  
  
Turning his head, Toby kissed Elliot's chest. "I know. And I love you to. So are we really going to go sightseeing tomorrow?"  
  
"If you want. Or we could stay inside this room and spend a little time with some more familiar sights."  
  
"Hmmm, both have merit."  
  
Elliot dropped his hand to squeeze Toby's ass. "Yes, they do. You've just got to remember Toby, life's too short. We need to embrace the gifts we've been offered."  
  
"Carpe Diem, huh?"  
  
"Yes. Think you can do it?"  
  
Slinging his arm across Elliot's chest, Toby nodded his head yes. "Or if not, I'm at least gonna die trying."  
  
  
—FIN—


End file.
